oh life, life, life.
lOis_oH
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Name: lOis
Country: Australia
Birthday: 3/26/1984
Gender: Female


Interests: procrastination
Expertise: procrastination


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Member Since: 8/18/2003

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Thoughts, Dreams, and Everything In-Between
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Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Stop. A snapshot.

So I live on day by day, planning weekend by weekend and jumping from this relationship to another. Time will eventually catch up with me and to my great surprise I'll realise the life I've forged in the end resembles nothing of what I envisioned years ago.

But still: this thoughtless blur of The Working Life is addictive, if only because it is beautifully distracting - The saviour from the too deep and too meaningful questions like the why's and the what for's.

I sit here with too much time on my hands for the first time in months, and I watch my thoughts expand to unbearable weights just to fill the silence. I'm buried in them. It is suffocating.


Friday, July 03, 2009

Night shift

Hospital at night is a surreal place. All the doctors and nurses that hustle and bustle during the day disappear, leaving the wards with silence save for the occasional beeps from heart monitors and the gentle drone of intravenous infusion machines. During this time you work almost like a ghost, roaming through wards unnoticed, taking care of little things while making sure everyone is alive.

It's peaceful, quiet, and comes with a fair amount of autonomy as a doctor which is always fun; if you ask me though, the best part of being a ghost is you can crank up your ipod and dance around the hospital and no one's there to notice.


Sunday, May 17, 2009

Chronic fatigue

So it’s been almost 5 months since I became a doctor.

To be honest I still cringe a little when I say the d-word, sort of like when I call a whooping big bluff during Poker and I’m pretty certain the opponent’s seeing right through it. It certainly isn’t what I thought it’d be, and after countless cannulas, rectal exams and hours working overtime without getting paid, I am often tempted to swallow a needle or grab the nearest medical student and shake them and shout, ‘DUDE IT’S NOT WORTH IT! RUN WHILE YOU CAN!’

I guess it’s not all gloom and cannulas, though. I mean, when you manage to get through to a stubborn patient to get that scan that they really ought to have, or watch a patient get better with the medications you’ve prescribed, or even when you’re able to comfort a family member who’s just lost their dad, I realise that ultimately dealing with people is what I love about what I do.

That, and the awesome stories that come with the job. Seriously, almost any intern will have at least one story that involves sharp things, blood, tears or unsightly body parts. How cool is that? At the very least you’ll never run out of things to talk about, right?


Friday, April 10, 2009

I guess I just miss you

Only after you've gone I find the words I wanted to say to you and I realise my heart is slipping through my fingers and flowing into yours - ever so easily, ever so insidiously - and I don't know whether to weep or smile at the fact that we're becoming so intertwined; in the meantime, I trace your kisses you left on my cheek and hold onto the last of the scent you left in this empty space.


Saturday, March 21, 2009

My Whimsical

i miss the days when i could call you out at 3 in the morning to rescue me from my thoughts and steal your cigarettes and watch the stars burn into nothing.



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